A Poem from my Journal

I woke this morning and made my way to work. From the dock of our warehouse I experienced a beautiful sunrise of burnt orange and blue clouds. It was as if God was saying I am bringing you to a new dawn of beauty. The crisp air brought renewal and the feeling of a fresh start.

Dark and Gray clouds may fill the air of the soul.
Seeking the sunrise is our ultimate goal.
The sun when it rises seems so very pure.
It can speak to the heart to seek, fight, endure.

So seek the morning and its fresh new start.
It serves a purpose a special part.
It removes the feelings of anguish and fright.
It fills the believer with Gods Holy might.

BMO 2010

Red Maple

My Sister emailed my Dad and asked for help with a poem for school about a tree. This is what he sent:

My Name is Red Maple

He goes to sleep early and he wakes up late.
That's how God made him cause he doesn't like to wait.

His leaves wave in the wind when the summer winds blow
But when the air gets cooler the leaves say lets go

My leaves are big and green when you need some good shade
But when the pumpkins start coming my work will be made

That's when I change my color for the world to see
Its the color in my name that makes me - me.

So when its time for night night and I must go to bed.
Its what makes me so special cause I turn a bright red.

~Macy

Confidence in Him

After God promised Abraham "I will make you a great nation"(Gen. 12:2) Twenty five years clasped before the birth of his on Isaac (21:5) During that period, Abraham questioned God about his lack of a child (15:2) and even resorted to fathering a son through his wife's hand maiden (16:15)
Yet through the ups and downs, God kept reminding Abraham of his promise to give him a child, while urging him to walk faithfully with Him and believed(17:1-2)

When we claim one of God's promises in the Bible, whether it is peace of mind, courage, or provision, we place ourselves in His hands and on His schedule.


"Confidence must be in our hearts and the timing in His hands"

Keepers Weepers - Losers Finders

I remember and old saying when I was a kid that went



Finders Keepers Losers Weepers.



I have a new one that I think puts a stamp on my feeling currently towards God and the journey that I am traveling.

Keepers Weepers - Losers Finders



God gives me more peace day by day that He and only He can provide.



I will post more in the weeks to come. I just have to get by this last part of summer heat.

Praying always,

Bryan

A Warriors Trust,

Imagine, if you will, the trust that a warrior must exhibit in battle. It must transcend all understanding, to rely upon a Commander that may be setting a plan that he must follow. No questions asked. No thought of it being the right course of action. He must receive his orders and execute them with precision and without question. To question them would make the warrior vulnerable. For the warrior does not see the whole battlefield. He does not see bullets and the bombs that land around his foxhole. He is pinned down only being able to return action on what he sees. The threats that lay before him and his vision becomes narrow. The Commander sees the whole war. He sees where the enemy is deployed and the threats out of your realm. To thwart a counter attack that may be threatening you from the rear.

This week I questioned my Commander. As I lay pinned down under the heavy fire I questioned His plan. Things were blowing up around me. I could not see the other soldiers fighting through the battles of this world and I felt so alone. I received reports from the front that the war was raging. Yet I sat in my foxhole unable to move and engage in anything. I finally realized in my distress that I could request central command for support from above. The Commander knew that battle that raged and in His wisdom He was contemplating what he would allow to be taken and what he would do to save. I understand now that He actually does care. He is not concerned with the battle as His thoughts are totally focused on the war.

During the battle there are times to reflect. To think about all the parts of this plan that I could control. All that I could do was trust in His plan and to know that He knew the big picture. My thoughts raced back to my memories of the Israelites exodus from Egypt. Their battle raged all around them. They were allowed to leave Egypt only to be later pursued by one of the greatest armies know to the world at that time. What lay before them was the vast Red Sea and behind them the army that was gaining fast. To the warrior it seemed that there was no escape. It was death before them and destruction behind. Doubt and fear and terror took over. Then it happened that through the faith of a single field general that the Supreme Commander made walls of water through a vast and open sea. Each warrior who passed through the deliverance had doubted the field general and Commander and and they were ashamed of their mistrust. They did not see the whole plan, only seeing what lay before them and behind. We cannot dread any result of the Commanders will if we are obedient. WE must trust and become the liberty that sets us free at a later date. It may be that all we can do is fight our small battle. Our only job may be that of the radio operator. A job that calls in the coordinates for support . The Commander hears the call. We must allow Him to deploy. He may vary well decide to give up that hill in battle so the war may be won.

Then the Lord said to Moses, " Why are you crying out to Me? Tell the sons of Israel to go forward" Exodus 14:15

Hear me Lord and I will go forward. I am at Your command.

In Your service,
Bryan

The Rewards of Difficulty and Misfortune

John Bunyan was 32 when he was arrested for preaching at his own church. He was sent to Bradford prison in which he spent twelve long years in a cold, damp cell. Those in authority promised to release him if he would only stop preaching. He refused to let his circumstances get him down and he kept a positive attitude during this time. Bunyan even went as far as saying that God had turned his prison into a blessed place. He encouraged his fellow prisoners, prayed and wrote at least six books during this time. He actually saw this adversity as a great time to study the word of God and ponder the spiritual aspects of life.

Bunyan was released from Bradford in 1762 and was arrested again for preaching 3 years later. He accepted this greater difficulty as just another opportunity to read, meditate, and write. During the next 6 months in the dark and depressing prison, Bunyan wrote his masterpiece- The Pilgrim's Progress.

Bunyan's greatest triumph was a result of his greatest difficulty.

While my situation is different in the reason for my incarceration the resulting circumstances are exactly the same. My attitude determines the value of this situation. I will gain nothing from this experience if I only grasp the thoughts of the tragedy and never meditate on the value of the triumph.

I believe that God uses every battle to shape a man to become a better warrior for his purpose. We must search for the seed of good in every difficulty.

I pray for grace through this everyday.

In Him,
Bryan

WEAR ABC 3 :: Top Stories

WEAR ABC 3 :: Top Stories

Can Sorrow be turned to Joy?

Can sorrow be turned to Joy? That was my journal entry for 5-24-2010. I have spent days contemplating that thought. The majority of the time spent at this place I try to either work, study, pray, exercise or sleep. I search for places to retreat into silence. It is hard to do. Many seek me out to talk and much of my time is spent listening to family problems, convictions, sentencing issues, and a host of other issues of equal or lesser value. For many here the sorrow now stems from the pain that sits upon their families. They want to provide & protect. You can tell in their faces and between their words that they are resentful and are ready to fulfill the duties of which are required as Fathers, husbands, and children. There is another subsection that have no sorrow. They have a roof, 3 squares and ample time to figure how they can do it better next time. Another group is that of no sorrow. They do not know how. They have been here to long. They feel nothing other than angst in having to move into a world in which they not lived in for 10, 15, 20 years. Its sad and it breaks my heart. I talk to each. They are looking for that joy, even the ones that don't care. I know they must think about it deep inside. This place is another world. The chains are heavy but with God's help they can be broken. The issues with each are strong. I pray that God will give me correct words daily to speak and that I will be a light in this dark black place. That he will strengthen because the burdens of many weigh heavy when they are constant on the mind. I hear many. No matter were we are in life we can listen to others. Joy can come from sorrow. Peace can come from despair, Except it and it will happen.

"A Christian is a key hole through which other folks see God" -Robert E.Gibson

"You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trust in you." Isaiah 26:3

BMO 2010

Perfectly Calm 6-1-2010

"On that day, when evening came, He said to them, "Let us go over to the other side."
Mark 4:35

After a long day of ministry and healing Jesus loaded upon the boat with His disciples to escape the crowds for a rest. As they were traveling to the eastern shore, Jesus was exhausted and fell asleep in the front of the boat. A violent storm arose scaring the disciples and they woke Jesus. It was at that time that He stood up in the boat and spoke three words "Hush, be still". The wing and waves became perfectly calm from three small words spoken from His mouth. The disciples became afraid. They were no longer afraid of the storm. The fear that they now exhibited was the reverence for the super natural power of Jesus Christ.

Now I really do not know what I believed about this power prior to my current situation and accommodations. I can now say that I believe in that power. I believe He answers prayers because He has. I believe He can do miracles because He has and I believe He can speak and calm storms because I have seen it.

I can often work myself up into a storm that my mind cannot handle. There are many many times when I feel Him stand and say to me "Hush, be still." He says I am in control. I bow before Him laying my request at his feet. I try to stay perfectly calm and wait. I wait upon His answer.

Dan Crawford wrote in reference to this verse.
"Christ said, "Let us go to the other side"- Not to the middle of the lake to be drowned."

"Peace is the Feeling when we finally trust Him to calm the storm"

BMO 2010

John 16:33

"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble, But take heart! I have overcome the world." John 16:33


"I believe in the sun even if it isn't shining. I believe in love even when I am alone. I believe in God even when He is silent" -Unknown-


Holding Fast,
Bryan

5-21-2010

I recently read a story about a tragic accident that occurred during a canoe trip in Maine. The person writing had come to a small dam on the river and had put into shore to portage around the obstacle. A second boat arrived and attempted to traverse over the freezing water. Unable to reach him, they watched in horror as the man struggles desperately to swim downstream against the backwash at the base of the dam. He only struggled a few minutes and died of hypothermia. Immediately his body was sucked down into the water and he emerged 10 yards downstream. What he had tried in vain to achieve in the last moments of his life, the currents accomplished within seconds of giving against that ended up delivering him when his human body fought no more. Had he dove deep and stayed calm the current would have delivered him.

I am all to familiar with this story. Sometimes we get into situations our human nature kicks in and we make decisions that are outside God's will. We fight against the current and its the very current that we could save us/ We must, at times, back up and understand where we are, how we got there, and dive deep into the current of integrity, honor and commitment and make decisions that honor HIM!!!

My Journal 5/10/2010

It is possible for the best years of our life, the best experiences, the best fought & won, the best services performed, to be overshadowed by failure, defeat dishonor, and useless. We cannot let times of rare promise and achievement to end in disappointment. Yesterdays failures can eat up today's victories, and today's victories can eat up yesterdays failures. Use the time and your life to be victorious daily looking at failures as opportunities for growth and victory in a life well lived as a GOAL... (BMO/2010)

My Journal Entry 5/4/2010

I pray that the writing of my journal will speak less of self doubt, of despair, and self consciousness as time passes. Each day reveals to me my inheritance in the Lord and just like a piece of land I will work to cultivate it until it is fruitful. Not forgetting who I was, but striving towards who He wants me to be… (BMO 5/4/2010)
Everyday since the fall of the company and the resulting legal issues that followed, I have taken inventory of all decisions both negative and positive from the early years of my life. It did not take me coming to a Federal Prison Camp to reveal to me my shortcomings. Those were revealed when I made every stupid decision. I had spent many hours, before I came here, trying to understand who I was and why I made the decisions that I made. My contemplation of events disgusted me. I decided at that time that they would never be repeated and I began down the road of the commitment of change but as I wrote above the pain of those decisions continued to haunt me. God revealed some things to me recently and I will share one of the most recent journal issues.

Psalm 37: 23-25

The steps of man are established by the Lord and He delights in His way. When he fails he will not be hurled head long. Because the Lord is the one who holds his hand. I have been young and now I am old, yet I have not seen the righteous forsaken, or his descendents begging bread.

The Devil Aims High

A really dear friend of mine recently went home to his family and selfishly it was a sad day for me. Cowboy, as I will refer to him for his love for western novels, had been here close to a year in a situation that was so hard to believe. I still cannot understand why he even had to be here but he was. He was a strong Christian man, older and distinguished, with peace that only God could provide. I enjoyed our visits and he helped me cope with the sadness, anger, and overall hopelessness that overcome me daily. In getting to know him and who he was in his heart I shared with him this truth several days before he left.

The Devil Aims High

And Jesus being full of the Hold Spirit returned from Jordan and was led by the spirit into the wilderness, being forty days tempted by the devil. Luke 4:1-2

What strikes me of this passage it that Jesus was full of the Holy Spirit and was led by the Holy Spirit and He was still tempted! Is it not any different for you and I? Temptation and trials come on a man when he is closest to God. The devil pulls all his strongest power to topple a man who is close to God.

Think about it! Peter walked with Christ and denied Him! He said he didn't even know him. Lets face it, Satan attacked me and I crumbled. I chose easy because of fear. I chose procrastination over conflict. That was the past.

Here is what I know now!

God allows temptations and trials because is does what storms do fro the oak trees- It drives the roots deep -, it does what the fire does for paintings on porcelain - it makes it permanent.

I wrote to cowboy on the day of his departure: Cowboy the devil aimed high when he got you with this trial. Thank you for your encouragement. You drove your roots deeper and made your painting permanent and through it all gave me HOPE!

Upon his parting he had a set of saddlebags made in the leather shop here at the camp. I had drawn a picture earlier in my stay and he asked if he could proudly have the image placed on one side of the bag. He was to use the bags in hi new ministry of helping kids. I felt honored and have included the picture for all to see.

The picture is based on Psalms 1:2-3

I love you all and count the days till my return.

In Him,

Bryan

The Manna

It has really been put on my heart of late to share my experiences, the manna, that the Lord has FED me with in my wilderness. I will share these thoughts and revelations weekly. A glimpse, if you will, into my world and I hope you are blessed by the words as I have been blessed by each truth that He has revealed.

As a side note, my daughter and niece are helping me to post these stories and I am so blessed to have each one. They encourage me daily more than they ever know.